Sirens and shouts fill the air,
Throngs of people pack the streets,
Chaos and claustrophobia descend like a fog.
They clog every pore, fill every orifice,
choking, smothering, strangling the city
There is no question of the power of the state.
Metal beasts thunder down the street.
Judge, jury, and executioner,
They stand poised to spew fire.
None dare draw their ire,
Nor challenge the finality of a gunshot.
Suddenly, steel screams in protest as
One after another the behemoths grind to a halt.
A lone man, his groceries in hand,
Stands in opposition to the oppressors.
His stone faced defiance speaks louder than any words
Then a shot rings out
It is not the sound of gunfire opening,
But rather of film winding, a shutter closing,
And changing the world.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteI liked the imagery/diction choices used throughout, like where you say "metal beasts thunder down the street." This allowed those readers to feel the tanks coming through the square. I also liked the description of the man; I had not even noticed him before that line in your poem. But your description brought a story behind him, someone I hadn't even noticed, and it could be seen as a metaphor for those who least stand out may bring about the biggest change, and have the most meaning.
ReplyDeleteI think the similar sized stanzas (1,2,3) maybe not intentionally, but did help the progression to the point and climax of the poem. The stanzas start out larger, then go down to three lines and then to one, emphasizing the intensifying purpose of the piece.
ReplyDeleteI really love how you manage to capture the essence of the photograph. I especially admire your ability to lightly pepper your poem with a tasteful amount of alliteration. I think this, paired with your non alliterated phrases like "They clog every pore, fill every orifice," is extremely effective in emphasizing parts of your poem.
ReplyDeleteThe comparison of what a normal shot ringing out and what people would expect it to be like and the reality of what happened is very effective in helping the audience think about it a little differently. I like the diction of "scream" and the alliteration in that line to bring attention to it. The last line of the poem had a lot of power to it.
ReplyDeleteThe comparison of what a normal shot ringing out and what people would expect it to be like and the reality of what happened is very effective in helping the audience think about it a little differently. I like the diction of "scream" and the alliteration in that line to bring attention to it. The last line of the poem had a lot of power to it.
ReplyDelete